


Jealous

by Wheres_my_badger



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Chan is practically Jisung's dad, Changbin the voice of reason, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Kinda, M/M, a bit of angst, fluff?, he just wanted to hang out with Chan, jealous jisung, jisung centric, poor sungie, probably, request, the relationship is platonic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-26 15:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16684123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wheres_my_badger/pseuds/Wheres_my_badger
Summary: Jisung and Chan's relationship has always been a bit different. When Felix shows up will they be able to keep it intact?





	Jealous

**Author's Note:**

> This was requested through Twitter. Hope you like the story ^.^

Jisung didn’t like to admit it, because it embarrassed him a bit, but he was thankful for the fact that Chan had taken him under his wing. Going to Korea to pursue his dream and being accepted in one of the biggest entertainment agencies seemed like a dream come true, at first, but… well, Jisung couldn’t deny that on his first day as a trainee he was pretty scared. He was fourteen, and he had no idea how to act or what to do, and he had never been in a situation like that before. So when Chan found him and offered to guide Jisung through that confusing stage, Jisung was more than glad to accept the help. And then Chan had simply fully adopted Jisung, and Jisung was thankful for that.

Because of that, from the beginning their relationship was a bit… different. Most people would call it weird. Jisung didn’t like that word, so he settled for different. Maybe it was because Jisung was fourteen when he arrived, and seventeen-year-old Chan felt responsible for him. Maybe it was because Jisung’s chubby cheeks and doe eyes gave him this child-like look that made Chan feel extra protective of him. And maybe it was because Jisung let Chan take care of him and lead him, liked being taken care of by the older. The fact was that Jisung and Chan’s relationship was different than what a relationship between friends usually was, and different from their own relationships with their other friends.

Jisung knew the others noticed this. Changbin often joked about Chan being Jisung’s dad, and it never failed to make Jisung blush, because maybe… well, maybe he did feel a bit like Chan was a parental figure, but that didn’t mean he wanted Chan to know about that. Woojin, too, sometimes teased the way Jisung obeyed to Chan and played around with the older, and at first it had embarrassed Jisung to no end, but he learned to deal with it, and since Chan didn’t seem to mind he decided he shouldn’t either.

So from the beginning, Jisung had all of Chan’s attention. He was the only one who had that type of relationship with Chan, the only one the older seemed keen on taking care of, so he was the only one who received that special attention from Chan. Until, that is, Felix joined.

It is important to make one thing clear: Jisung didn’t hate Felix, at least not at first. Actually, when Chan showed up with the boy and Jisung discovered they were practically birthday twins he had been extremely excited. Felix seemed nice and sweet, and he was the same age as Jisung, and even if his Korean was bad Jisung knew enough English to get by and talk to the boy easily. So he had been the most excited member at Felix’s arrival, and the one who received the news the best. Until, of course, he started noticing that the attention he used to get from Chan was slowly being stolen away.

At first Jisung didn’t mind much. It was just a movie Chan couldn’t watch with him because he was teaching Felix Korean or a day he couldn’t write with Jisung because he was helping Felix with his rap. And Jisung didn’t mind _much_ , because he knew Felix needed help, and he knew Chan was the best person to help him. So Jisung tried to suffocate the little flame of jealousy that was trying to grow in his chest. But as time passed and Chan seemed to be becoming busier and busier with Felix, his time with Jisung decreased more and more, until Jisung barely saw Chan at all.

Jisung didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to hate Felix, but he started resenting the boy. He didn’t want to hate Chan, but he started feeling anger pile up in his heart. And he didn’t want to do anything about it, because… well, it was ridiculous. He wasn’t a baby, he didn’t need anyone going around with him all the time and taking care of him. He was old enough to take care of himself. If anyone found out he was feeling jealous of Chan taking care of Felix they would laugh at him for the rest of his life. So he ignored it as best as he could, and if he started avoiding Felix and Chan no one needed to know why.

 

Jisung was having a bad day. He had woken up late, and hadn’t had time to eat before rushing to the company. His rap tutor had then scolded him for being late, and then scolded him for how sleepy and creaky his voice sounded from him having woken up just a while earlier. After that amazing practice he had eaten a protein bar he kept on his bag for emergencies, but it tasted bad and was extremely crumbly, and he had gotten scolded for leaving crumbles on the floor, even though he was already crouching down to clean it up.

After this whole mess of a morning, his afternoon consisted of him trying to write lyrics while he listened to Chan and Felix mess around next to him. Chan was supposed to be helping Felix with lyrics; Jisung didn’t know what part of lyric writing involved that much giggling. Changbin, next to Jisung, didn’t seem affected. Jisung, on the other hand, couldn’t write more than three lines in a whole hour.

The last straw was when Chan finally decided to stop messing around and decided it was ‘time to be serious’ and asked Jisung for his lyrics. Jisung was already frustrated from a whole week of barely seeing Chan and the horrible day he had had so far, and having to show Chan his ridiculous three lines wasn’t exactly a good continuation to that series of events. He showed them anyways, without saying anything. Chan frowned.

“Jisung, what have you been doing for the past hour?”

Asked the older. It wasn't harsh, just confused, but on Jisung's current emotional state it was like being screamed at. Jisung felt anger bubble up on his stomach. By his side, Changbin looked up, expression apprehensive.

“Writing, hyung.”

Said Jisung, through gritted teeth. Chan frowned.

“And how come you only have this? Even Felix wrote…”

And that was it. Jisung got up, ripping his notebook from Chan’s hand, and he could vaguely tell that the boy was shocked at the action and that Changbin was looking at him with pity in his eyes, but he didn’t care.

“I don’t care about what Felix wrote! I don’t care if he’s amazing or really funny, or if he writes better lyrics than me and faster than me! I don’t care about him! And maybe that’s what’s wrong! Maybe if I did I could be just like him, and then everything would be perfect for you!”

And saying that he ran away, ignoring the way Chan was calling for him and the way Changbin tried to stop him from leaving. He ran away not caring where he was going. He just wanted to leave.

 

“What the…? What the hell was that about? Why…?”

Started Chan, only to be interrupted by Changbin groaning.

“Hyung, you, and please know I’m saying this in the nicest way possible, are really stupid.”

Chan raised an eyebrow. By his side, Felix was looking at the scene with eyes wide, probably not understanding half of what was going on.

“Excuse me?”

Chan asked. He had no idea what had just happened, but apparently Changbin had, and Chan needed to get to the bottom of this. It wasn’t like Jisung to scream like that or say those kinds of things. He was usually a sweet boy, who cared about everyone and was overly affectionate. Chan had no idea what had brought that on.

Changbin rolled his eyes.

“Please, hyung, you can’t be this blind.”

Chan frowned.

“Blind? How…? What…? Am I missing something here?”

He asked. Changbin snorted.

“I can’t believe this, you really haven’t noticed.”

Chan glared, getting frustrated.

“Noticed. What.”

He asked. Changbin looked at him, not amused.

“The way Jisung has been acting lately. The way he has been avoiding you and Felix, the way he hasn’t been smiling. The way he doesn’t ask you to help him and doesn’t ask you to spend time with him anymore. The way he looks like he’s going to cry every time you decide to have a movie night with Lix.”

Chan was baffled. He had never noticed that, but as he heard Changbin talking he started noticing that the boy was right. Jisung used to be bright and affectionate, and lately he had been smiling and laughing less, and Chan hadn’t cuddled with him or seen the boy cuddle with the others even once in the previous week.

“What…? But why?”

He asked. Changbin shook his head.

“For someone who’s supposed to be perceptive you’re pretty dumb, hyung.”

Chan glared.

“Changbin…”

Changbin shook his head.

“It’s not my place to tell you. I’ll take Lix out to see the city. You go talk to Sung.”

He said. Chan frowned.

“I don’t even know where…” Changbin raised an eyebrow. Chan sighed. “Just don’t get back too late, ok?”

 

Jisung ignored Jeongin’s wide eyes and worried questions as he entered the dorms, heading straight to his room and slamming the door shut. There was no lock, but Jisung knew Jeongin wouldn’t try to talk to him at the moment. He lay down on his bed.

One the ten-minute walk from the company to their dorm, all of Jisung’s anger had become sadness, and Jisung had barely managed to stop himself from crying on the middle of the street. As soon as his head hit his pillow, however, he finally let the tears out, sobbing into the sheets and soaking his pillow, but he didn’t care.

He sat up after a few seconds, feeling restless, and pressed his pillow into his face, frustration and sadness and anger making him want to hit something or scream. Instead, he just continued to cry, gripping his pillow tightly as sobs wrecked his body.

And for a while, he just cried. For all the times Chan had rejected him and chosen to watch a movie with Felix instead. For all the times Jisung had written lyrics on his own when he was used to writing with Chan, because now Chan had someone else to work with. And then, after a long time, his tears finally dried and he lay down, drained. He closed his eyes.

He was on the verge of falling asleep when his door opened. Jisung sat up, ready to tell Jeongin to go away. Instead, he came face to face with Chan. His eyes immediately welled up and he looked away. It was surprising he still had any tears left to cry.

“Go a-away.”

He managed to say. Chan made a distressed sound on the back of his throat and closed the door, moving to sit by Jisung on the bed. Jisung refused to look at him.

“Sungie…”

Jisung gritted his teeth.

“I said go away!”

He said, trying to push Chan. Instead of succeeding, Chan grabbed his wrists and pulled Jisung closer, and Jisung resisted for a few seconds, before giving up and letting Chan pull him into his lap.

Chan was warm, as usual, and despite everything his arms around Jisung still made the younger feel safe and protected. Jisung cried even harder when he noticed how much he had missed this. How much he missed cuddling with Chan and having the older hold him. He had thought he was strong enough to simply get over this. He wasn’t. He didn’t want to get over it.

“Shh, hey. You’re ok, Sungie. Hyung is here with you.”

Jisung just hid his face against the older’s chest and fisted his hands on Chan’s shirt, letting Chan whisper reassuring words to him.

 

After a while, Jisung managed to stop crying and pulled back. He dried his cheeks, trying to get away from Chan. The older let him, but didn’t let him go too far.

“Are you ready to talk now?”

He asked. Jisung shrugged.

“Whatever.”

Chan sighed.

“Sung, please tell hyung what’s wrong.”

Jisung didn’t want to. He didn’t want Chan to know how much of a baby he was, he felt embarrassed about the whole situation.

“Nothing’s wrong, hyung.”

He said. Obviously, Chan didn’t believe.

“Sung, you haven’t been smiling or laughing. You haven’t been asking me to hang out with you. You have been avoiding Felix. Obviously something’s wrong.”

At that Jisung looked up, eyes wide. Chan had… noticed? And then it dawned on him. He looked down.

“Don’t pretend you care, hyung. You only know that because Changbin hyung told you.”

Chan’s slightly embarrassed expression confirmed Jisung’s statement.

“I… ok, Changbin did tell me, but what do you mean with pretending I care? Of course I care. How could you think I don’t care about you, Ji?”

The nickname was something Chan hadn’t used in quite some time, and it made Jisung want to cry again. He didn’t.

“Hyung, please just drop it. Nothing is wrong, ok?”

Chan sighed, and he sounded a bit frustrated.

“Ji, the way you screamed today… that’s not like you. Not at all. And Felix…”

Jisung didn’t even let him finish.

“Stop talking about Felix!”

He screamed. His eyes widened. He hadn’t meant to say that. Chan’s eyes widened too.

“What…?” Jisung could see the engines turning on the boy’s head. “Ji, are you jealous?”

Jisung wanted to run and hide.

“Just go.”

He said, trying to turn away from Chan. The older didn’t let him.

“Ji, are you…”

Jisung groaned.

“Yes! Yes, I’m jealous. I’m jealous of how much time you two spend together, and I’m jealous that you watch movies without me, and I’m jealous because nowadays you only care about him! You like him more than you like me.”

He said, and then he pulled away from Chan and pulled his knees up, hiding his face there.

“Jisung…”

Jisung shook his head.

“I know it’s stupid. You can laugh. Go on.”

For quite some time they stayed in silence. Then a gentle hand pulled Jisung from his hiding spot, and Jisung was forced to look at Chan. The boy’s eyes were a bit teary, and Jisung felt horrible for making Chan cry.

“Fuck, I’m so fucking sorry, Ji.” Jisung’s eyes widened. He hadn’t expected that. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so, so sorry, oh god.”

Jisung let himself be pulled into a hug, confused as to what was happening.

“Hyung…”

He started. Chan shook his head, pulling back.

“I’m sorry. I got so distracted by Felix that I didn’t… I should have noticed. I can’t believe I was this stupid. No one will ever replace you, Sung. Never.”

Jisung blinked a few times.

“It’s not… I’m just being stupid, hyung.”

He said. Chan shook his head.

“I should have noticed you were feeling left out. It’s been weeks since we last spent time together, I’m sorry, Ji.”

Jisung felt his own eyes watering, but he tightened his jaw, refusing to cry again.

“Felix needed you more.”

He said. Chan once again shook his head.

“I could have asked you to join us anyways. You were used to something, you used that to feel safe and comfortable, and I took it away from you. I promised you I would take care of you, and I didn't. I was a bad friend and hyung.”

He said. Jisung blushed. They had never talked about their unusual relationship. Jisung knew how it felt and worked, and he knew Chan did to, but they had never… actually talked about it. They had never mentioned how just Chan’s presence was enough to calm Jisung down, and how Chan was the only one who could reach Jisung on his bad days.

“I…” He tried to say. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I’m sorry I yelled at you and Lix, hyung.”

He said. Chan shook his head.

“We’ll fix that. Don’t worry about it. Can you forgive me, Ji? Believe it when I say no one will ever take your place in my heart, ok?”

Jisung looked at Chan, then nodded. Chan pulled Jisung into a hug, and Jisung melted against the older, sighing contentedly and feeling comfortable for the first time in ages.

 

Jisung laughed as Felix gave up on pronouncing the words correctly and simply spoke gibberish while rapping. They were locked in that room since morning, and it was already way past lunch-time, so needless to say they were all going a bit crazy. Chan snorted.

“Ok, you know what? Break, we need a break.”

Jisung and Felix immediately perked up, looking at each other for a second before racing to the door. Chan, Changbin and Hyunjin laughed, watching them run, then got up and followed the two boys to the company cafeteria.

“Hyung, what are we watching today?”

Asked Felix, when the other three settled down next to him and Jisung. Chan shrugged.

“It’s Sungie’s turn.”

He said. Jisung smiled.

After their little talk on Jisung’s room, they had found a balance. Chan still helped Felix with Korean and rapping, but now he made sure to involve Jisung in it, letting the younger help too and making sure the boy wasn’t left out. Their movie nights were now weekly, and involved all three of them, and when one of them couldn’t participate there were no hard feelings, because they had talked about that already.

Things had slowly fallen into place. Jisung had learned to deal with sharing Chan’s attention, and Chan had learned how to take care of Felix while still being the same person he was with Jisung before Felix showed up.

“How To Train Your Dragon.”

Jisung said. Felix and Chan groaned.

“Again?”

Felix whined. Jisung nodded, smiling happily. Chan snorted.

“You’ll memorize that whole movie if we keep this up.”

He said. Jisung chuckled, knowing Chan and Felix’s annoyance was just for show. He leaned against Chan, elbowing him slightly.

“It’s a nice movie.”

He whined, pouting, also just for show. Chan rolled his eyes and pulled Jisung closer, ruffling his hair.

“Of course it is.”

He said, and Jisung smiled, happy to have Chan, Felix, and all of the other boys in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> What did you guys think?


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